Isolation is hell

Lately I've been struggling with depression. Feeling and being isolated...not necessarily by choice. It's been 2 1/2 years since I discovered my husband's criminal activity fueled by sex addiction. At that time I had no plans of continuing our relationship and I turned to friends for support. Since then I have seen my friendships die a slow and painful (for me) death.

It's days like these

It's days like these that make me frustrated at my husband for making the choices he did. The weather is perfect. I'd love to go camping or hiking or take the dog to the park, but we can't...because my husband is a registered sex offender.

Red flags

Even before I knew about his addiction I felt like at times something didn't feel right. I ignored my gut and blamed my inner alarm on having dated an alcoholic/drug addict before him. I now call the behavior of ignoring myself as being codependent.

My past...how did I end up here

We often times forget or don't realize that the way we were raised and the events that happened throughout our lives have a huge impact on who we choose to spend our lives with.

Legal process...when acting out turns illegal

If you have read my previous posts you know that my initial discovery included finding out that my husband (boyfriend at that time) had his computers seized for suspicion of illegal images. I wanted to follow up on the process/outcome of that for others who may be going through the same thing and don't know what the process is.

Why I married a sex addict

I've seen a lot of post's online where women said "if I had known he was a sex addict before, I never would have married him". In some ways I can understand this. They said vows and they expected their partner to honor them. In my situation I guess I was lucky that I knew about the addiction before we had crossed that bridge... and because of it we had PLENTY of therapy, I knew exactly what I was getting into. Maybe the difference is that I had a choice.

Recovery... Group therapy and 12 step

Shortly after finding out my boyfriend was a sex addict, I began searching for other people in similar situations to relate to.

After disclosure....

My boyfriend asked me if it would be okay for him to begin seeing my current therapist for personal sessions because he felt she was more engaging and more experienced in dealing with sexual addiction than his current therapist.

Therapy and full disclosure

My first meeting with my therapist was better than I expected. She ressured me that nothing I did (or didn't do) would have changed his behavior. She was experienced in not only dealing with sexual abuse, but she had a history of working with sexual offenders as well.

How I found out...Discovery Oct 2013

That day seemed like any other day, nothing out of the ordinary. My boyfriend (at that time, but is now my husband) called me on my drive home from work and said that he needed to talk to me about something when I got home. I began to feel like something wasn't right.